which was very active from 1995 to 2003, and sort of half-active from 2003 to 2007.
Now it is gone.
The Tiki Bar Review Pages site was replaced by the book Tiki Road Trip in 2003 - the second edition of which (2007) is available NOW.
See Tiki Road Trip (2007 edition) for the most up-to-date information.
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Omni Hut
Smyrna (Nashville), TNFull review and history of Omni Hut
is available in Tiki Road Trip
During a road trip from Chicago to Mammoth Cave in Kentucky, I decided to go the extra mile (or the extra 120 miles... each way) to head down to Tennessee and scope out the Omni Hut.
I often wonder: am I crazy for making time consuming and expensive detours like this one just to eat at an old restaurant? I probably am, but you, dear reader, should be glad for my mania as it allows you to live vicariously through my looney and often dangerous retro-epicurean adventures.
As it turned out, the 240 mile detour ended up being more than worth our time. It is really nice to know that after seven years spent travelling to dozens of Tiki Bars on three continents, I can still be pleasantly surprised. We have a lot of great things to say about the Omni Hut. First, let's review the comments of DAC Crowell, who first alerted us the existance of the Omni hut a few years ago:
DAC Crowell writes...
OK...it's not a tiki bar, because where it's located, liquor by the drink isn't legal. But as for Polynesian restaurants, this is an oldie and a goodie. Located SE of Nashville, TN in the suburb of Smyrna, Omni Hut was started by a USAF officer and his wife while they were stationed at the long-defunct Sewart AFB there. The decor contains elements that've been part of the place since the early 1960s when it was created, and they've gradually added elements on as years have gone by. Especially amazing is the wall of artificial tropical flowers, which have been colored in flourescent colors to react with the often-used blacklight in the place. There's two dining rooms, with the smaller of the two having an indoor waterfall, and everywhere one finds the usual trappings of ceiling fishnets, glass-ball floats, bamboo, clamshells, and of course, tikis.
The food is excellent Polynesian...they've been cooking this style for going on 40 years now, and they know it well. Interestingly, during the late 1960s Omni Hut actually ran a chain of takeout Polynesian places in the Nashville area. All of these are closed now, though, although in their day they were pretty popular. Another interesting story concerns the design of a major interchange built near Omni Hut in the 1980s, designed to serve an expressway leading between I-24 and the Nissan plant there. Supposedly, great extra expense and design was taken to specifically avoid having to tear down or encroach on Omni Hut's property in the building of this interchange. If a normal design had been used, it would've certainly taken the place out. But it was said that the TN Department of Transportation's planners made sure to spare the restaurant, as it had numerous fans...not the least of which were the Japanese planners and execs involved with Nissan's TN operations!
They're still there and still cooking, being not only one of the longstanding true Polynesian restaurants, but now something of a Nashville-area institution."
So there you have it. DAC's comments definitely give one a good taste of the Omni Hut. My own adventure was a bit more complicated...
I left Chicago with my travelling companion around noon on a Monday, hoping to make Nashville by about 8:00. We would dine at Omni Hut, double back to downtown Nashville for a beer at Robert's, and then make a dent in the trip back north towards Mammoth Cave, grabbing a motel when we got tired. In this way, we would head to the farthest point from home and work our way back.
I had the air conditioner in my car charged before we left, since it was in the 90's that week, and we didn't think we'd want the windows open for 550 miles of freeway. The newly serviced air conditioner crapped out less than 150 miles into the trip, so it was a long and sweaty drive. Thanks, Jiffy Lube. Making the trip even more miserable were no less than four construction zones, which slowed us down quite a bit more. There's nothing quite like sitting on hot tarmac in humid 92 degree weather and not moving an inch for ten minutes at a time. We didn't roll into Nashville until well after 10:00 PM, and by that time, we were unsure if Omni Hut would even be open... but we pressed on. Around 11:00 we found it, and it was indeed closed. In fact, they aren't even open on Mondays (or Sundays) to begin with.
Always make that phone call before driving 550 miles to a Tiki Bar, kids!
Dejected, tired, but not really surprised, we headed back to Nashville, and bellied up at Robert's Bar, where the two of us inhaled three burgers and five beers in no time flat. The air conditioning was most welcome, the band were awesome (John England and the Western Swingers), and we just about melted into our booth after the exhausting drive. More on Robert's below...
&
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The next day we did see Mammoth Cave (more on that below too... we're trying hard to keep this a review of Omni Hut, but it isn't working, is it?). After the cave we stumbled across the Wigwam Village (an absoultely mandatory experience, and yes, more about it below), and then made the drive all the way back to Smyrna to finally dine at Omni Hut.
Whew!
The lengths we go to in the name of journalism!
As I said above, it was indeed worth all of this trouble. We were immediately impressed with the lobby, which features two large and unique Moari wall plaques. The usual Oceanic Arts accoutrements were present in quantity, as well as some of the best tapa cloth we have ever seen. This was apparently made by a former employee who was born in the South Pacific.
We were greeted by the owner herself, the friendly and enthusiastic Polly Walls. She was a bit taken aback by our appearance at first glance. Not too many people dress for the occasion of dining at Omni Hut, and when I showed up in a blue tiki-patterened shirt with my date in a show-stopping 1960s vintage Hawaiian styled mini dress augmented by custom-crafted tiki-heeled pumps (see picture), we made quite an impression. But if anyone was impressed, it was us; when DAC wrote positive things about the Tiki decor, we decided that it was worth making the trip to see. What we didn't expect was that the entire Retro Polynesian Vibe is still completely intact: the staff dress in Muumuus, and the music being played was a mix of Martin Denny, and traditional Hawaiian slide guitar. The aquarium is well maintained, and none of the decor looks old or run down. The artwork on the menu is mind bogglingly cool, the fountain still works... in short, this is one of the best and most lovingly preserved vintage Polynesian Restaurants I have seen. Even the placemats - with their detailed Hawaiian vocabulary lesson - are worth keeping. And how many places still use Orchids of Hawaii flatware?
Al of this is even more impressive given that a fire nearly closed them down a few years back. Most places would have used this as an excuse to give the place a boring modern remodeling, but Moni Hut was rebuilt as-is, and it looks great.
Unfortunately, we have to cut the review off here - the food, drinks, history, service, and decor are discussed in Tiki Road Trip, natch.
May 2002:
Eve Zibart writes:
Some weeks ago, in a restaurant review in the Washington Post (of a Polynesian restaurant in Washington that reminded me of my Nashville childhood, etc.), I passingly referred to the Omni Hut as closed. If possible, should you have opportunity and any other links, will you express my regrets for this mistake and my pleasure that it goes on? It would be much appreciated, as I have apparently caused some confusion to its fans and distress to its owners!
&
Here's a newspaper article about the fire...
August, 2000:
Fire ravages popular restaurant in Smyrna - By Lisa Marchesoni / Staff writer
SMYRNA
Fire which extensively damaged Omni Hut will keep the restaurant closed for two to three months for restoration, authorities said last week. The July 15, fire apparently started in the attic area above the kitchen, according to Fire Chief Bill Culbertson, who said Police Officer Gretchen Woodruff spotted the blaze at about 11:30 p.m. that night while on patrol on South Lowry Street. The officer immediately notified firefighters.
"Firefighters did an excellent job containing it," Culbertson said, explaining that crews contained the fire to the kitchen, roof and back part of the building. The dining area and front sustained only heavy smoke damage. Cause of the fire remains under investigation, he said. The staff had left about 30 minutes before Woodruff discovered the fire. Operator Polly Walls estimates the restoration could be completed within 60 to 90 days.
"We're trying to do as much as we can as quickly as we can," Walls said. Wall's father, Jim, opened the Omni Hut Polynesian restaurant in 1960. Daughter Polly Walls grew up at the restaurant, as did customers who come to the restaurant from all over Middle Tennessee. "We're feeding fifth generations in some families," Polly Walls said.
Smoke heavily damaged the Polynesian decor in the dining room, destroyed kitchen equipment and killed nine fish in the large built-in aquarium, including 10-year-old Big White and 5-year-old Big Orange. One tiny quarry catfish survived. "I think he's going to make it," Walls said. A new kitchen will be required in the renovation, she said. The restaurant's crew was able to salvage a freezer of frozen food but lost canned and refrigerated food. A shipment scheduled to arrive Tuesday was postponed. Walls expressed gratitude to Woodruff who was alert and spotted the fire and firefighters who contained the blaze. She says she's taking the "islanders' approach" to the fire. "Fire is a time of birth and renewal," Walls said. "She's (Omni Hut) still got a lot of life left in her."
To get to Omni Hut...We were heading on I-65 south, towards Nashville from northern Tennessee. In Nashville, take I-24 east toward Chattanooga. Get off at TN 102, exit 70 (about 16 miles past Nashville). Take a left at the end of the ramp, toward Smyrna. This turns into a controlled-access expressway. When you get to the US 41 exit, take the ramp north toward Smyrna. Omni Hut will be very obviously on the left, just off the interchange.
Heather writes:
Speaking as a longtime resident of northern Rutherford County - which is where Omni Hut is, thanks for reviewing them. Omni Hut was the place to get away for a little intimate dinner with your squeeze when I was a kid - and that may or may not have been your spouse. It was far enough away from Murfreesboro (county seat of Rutherford County), and close enough to Nashville to be near "The Big City", and it's hotel/motel industry. The fact that the food was great didn't hurt, of course. But as a kid, it was definitely an 'adult' sort of experience....my mother would take me to Pope Taylor's, but never Omni Hut. Nice page, and the Wigwam Village is, as you know, absolutely priceless.
&
More mid-century and Tiki artifacts
in Kentucky and Tennessee
(or: here's a road trip for you)
Aside from the Omni Hut, there isn't an overwhelming amount of Tiki in the southeastern quarter of the US of A (Florida being an island unto itself, of course). However, since most readers of this page are into Googie or other facets of mid-20th century culture or archiecture, here are some must-see sites in Tennessee and Kentucky.
The best place to start is in either Lousiville, Kentucky (if you're heading south) or Nashville, TN (if you're heading north). I'll start in Nashville.
Music City has a tourist district on Broadway street. Mixed in among the ultra pathetic Hard Rock Cafe and Planet Hollywood are a half dozen authentic country bars. Several of them are quite old. For the most part, there is no cover charge, but you are expected to tip the band. By far the best of these places is Robert's, which is notebale for being not just a bar, but for also being a boot shop. As if that isn't enough, BR5-49 got their start there, and still play the tiny stage from time to time. Towards the back is a grill where you can get burgers and other 'bar food'. Food and beer are cheap, entertainment is good, and the vibe is great. If you only visit one bar in Nashville, this is the one. Frankly, just about all of the others are pretty lame; one or two are woth poking your head into if you're already walking the strip looking for fun (such as Tootsie's Orchid Lounge). Explore. Check out the Ernest Tubb record shop too.
I couldn't find much else to do in Nashville; it is largely a modern pop-country mecca these days, and the extent of my interest in country music consists of a dozen or two old skool artists like Hank, Johnny, and Patsy, plus Bob Wills, Hank Snow, Maddox Bothers and Rose, and a few others. Oh, and a small selection of modern Western Swing artists, like the aforementioned BR5-49 and Big Sandy. And Junior Brown, of course.
What you want to do next is find a road called 31W. This state route runs parallel to I-65 from Nashville clear up to Lousiville, KY. Do not confuse 31W with 31E. They are completely different streets. You might think they are the same road, and that the 'E' or 'W' signifies which direction you are heading while on that road. In this case, that obvious conclusion is wrong. Both roads head in a north-south direction, in fact!
If you find 31W, you will want to follow it north, starting a few miles out of Nashville. The road snakes alongside I-65 on the east side, occasionally passing under the interstate to follow along the interstate's western side for a while. 31W never drifts more than a mile or so from it's big buddy, the interstate. If you ever get bored or need to make some time, you can always easily get back to I-65.
So whay do you want to be on this road? Good question. If you are the sort of person who likes travelling Route 66, you will love 31W. From Nashville to Louisville, you get 180 miles of 1950's diners, motels with awesome vintage neon signs, plenty of small towns, and countless cheesy roadside attractions. Flea markets, antique malls, junk shops, and scary hillbilly domiciles fill in the gaps. Sure, there are also long stretches of nothing, but that's to be expected.
Halfway between Louisville and Nashville you will find the intersection of SR 70. Turning left on SR 70 (heading west), you will have a drive of about six miles to Mammoth Cave National Park. They have about 8 different tours of the caverns that you can take for $8-$12 each. These are very worthwhile. We took the Historical Tour and the Frozen Niagra tour, each of which lasts a bit over two hours, and each of which go through completely different parts of the 350-mile cave system. All parts of the caves maintain a constant temperature of exactly 59 degrees all year around, all day, all night. This was bliss after driving around in humid 90 degree temperatures all day!
Even if you don't want to expore the caves, drive the six miles along SR 70 anyway. You will find some of the most astounding examples of retro tourist traps and neon hotel signs I have ever seen. We spotted a modern Mini Golf Course with a Tiki-filled fountain (photo coming soon), but that was actually among the least exciting parts of the trip!
The Golgotha theme park, set high on a hill was terrifying. George's Geodes provided us with some cool souvenir rocks for just a few bucks ("did we really just shell out five bucks for two rocks?!?"). Haunted Houses, Water Bumper Cars, funiculars over the hills, and mutiple Zoos await you, and most of them have been there for 50 years. You will also see lots and lots of firecracker shacks. My favorite had a neon 'sad clown' out front, crying neon tears... possibly because he just blew one of his frigging fingers off with an M-80? Check out the giant plaster Loch Ness Monster too. Even if you don't want to stop at any of this stuff, any retro-head will want to make the drive just for the density and frequency of astoundingly campy tourist traps the likes of which this country hasn't seen in decades.
Speaking of giant plaster stuff, driving 31W will reveal about three dozen wholesalers of concrete lawn orniments. We were trying to find out if the quarry where they mine the minerals to make concrete was along the route, because to say there exists an unnaturally large quantity of plaster lawn ornament wholesalers in this area would be a great understatement. There is an infestation of them, there are hordes of them.
And of course, you will find houses in the area owned by people who just had to take advantage of these businesses. As a result, they all look like Pee-Wee Herman's house. These are generally next door to ramshackle old shacks on the brink of collapse, with old cars abandoned for 35 years half sunk into the front lawn, rusty washing mashies on the porch, and a really mean looking dog roped to the side of the house. Speed past these...
Back onto 31W, just north of SR70, exists the crem de la creme of all of this, The Wigwam Village #2 (there used to be seven of them; two remain).
I cannot rave about this place enough - fifteen concrete Wigwams arranged in a semicircle around a sinkhole with a playground at the bottom. This is the sort of mecca that fans of retro culture daydream about stumbling across, and we did just that. Driving along in the heat, we passed the Star Motel and a few others that looked reasonalbly hip, and then there it was - like a mirage - Wigwam Village ("Sleep In A Wigwam!").
Tires screeched as we realized that we had found our home for the night. There could be no other option.
Let's face it - most surviving 1950's motels are dumps, and the only thing that makes them cool are the elaborate neon signs trying to lure you in. Any fan of mid-century design has surely noted that for some reason, hotels and diners seem to have the coolest signs ever, and great examples of these adverts are always something to point out on a road trip. But the signs are often the only thing these places have going for them. Typically the rooms have been remodeled or have just decayed, and are often pretty disgusting.
But the great thing about the Wigwam Village is that it has a whole lot more than a sign to recommend it. The people who built this thing really put their money where their mouth was. How cool is it that they went through the expense of building 15 separate cabins, each with it's own electricity and plumbing, when it would have been far easier and cheaper to build a standard motel?
I am ecstatic to report that Wigwam village is as well preserved as the Omni Hut is. For the bargain price of $40 per night, you get your own concrete WigWam, complete with private bathroom, cable TV, and air conditioner. The Wigwams are very clean, carefully maintained, and so damned charming that you'll want to jump up and down with glee when you check in. The furniture inside is all vintage. You get your own little parking space next to your Wigwam. There is a park bench in front of each of them so you can sit in front of your Wigwam and relax with a view of the playground, the other Wigwams, and the trees and stars.
&We sat on our bench having a drink in the moonlight when we got back from the Omni Hut, and it was a high point of the trip. A value at twice the price.
The gift shop is appropriatelyfull of fun, the owner is as nice as can be, and it is right on the road you are driving on anyway. How can you NOT stop?
Wigwam Village #2 is at 601 N. Dixie Hwy, in Cave City, KY, 42127. Phone is (270) 773-3381 It is easy to find: Dixie Hwy is the same as 31W, and Wigwam Village is about 1.5 miles north of SR 70 on 31W/Dixie Hwy.
The only caveat of this whole road trip is that you want to be VERY careful driving 31W at night. On the night before we found the Wigwam, we got pulled over THREE TIMES driving the 58 miles from Nashville to where we pulled over to sleep (right ear the TN/KY border). We weren't even speeding. On one of the occasions, the officer pulled me out of the car, and asked me about 100 questions (for almost half an hour) about any drugs, weapons, or other contraband I might be carrying. He asked why I was in Tennesse, separately interrogeted my passenger, and then came back and pestered me about questions she had answered somewhat differently than I had. He even threatened to pull the dog out of his car to sniff out our stuff.
We were eventually let go without even receiveing a ticket, but it was very unnerving!
The third cop who pulled us over was pals with the one mentioned above; halfway through his interrogation he answered his radio and was told by his predecessor that we were OK and he needn't detain us! He actually apoligized and sped us on our way.
"These hillbilly cops are freakin' my city slicker shit out!"
DAC Crowell has more to offer in regards to everything you have just read...
All I can say from the pics is 'Wow!"...they even seem to have improved on the decor a bit from the original version. And yes, you noticed that that food was a couple of notches above the usual Polynesian fare, too, so that hasn't changed either.
31W, hm? Takes me back. BTW, the reason you kept getting stopped was because that whole area up on the Highland Rim is a HUGE drug area...marijuana, meth, and so on...and anything out of state that doesn't look suitably 'businesslike' or 'family' is immediately suspect. In fact, probably a good bit of the weed that turns up in Chicago came out of that region.
Anyway, the REALLY amazing heyday of 31W was back when I was a little kid. At that time, the road all the way up into KY was a hodgepodge of innumerable fireworks stands, all of the homebrew variety. So what you had was a long road blanketed by neon-colored yellow, red, orange and so on billboards which fronted little trailers, all covered with bizarre hallucinatory artwork of hillbillies being gleefully blown up, snarling Black-Cat logos, garish and bizarrely-lettered storenames like "Sad Sam's" or "Crazy Clem's" with redneck-grade hallucino-caricatures of the supposed 'owner', etc. For some reason, also, that 'emotional state / proper name' motif was the main mode of naming these places, which made things even more bizarre. A remnant of this exists in Millersville, which I figure you drove thru, just north of Goodlettsville.
Sounds like you needed a better guide to Nashville, though; there's some things you missed. For future reference...
1) Parthenon. Yes, I said 'Parthenon'. Took Carl Stone to this thing, and it blew his mind! It is a 1:1 replica of the actual Parthenon in Athens, located in Centennial Park. Even has the giant statue of Athena, as best as could be reconstructed from classical accounts of the original. Not a tourist shuck, either...lower level contains a series of art galleries with permanent and rotating exhibits, upper level also contains a series of castings of the Elgin Marbles. West End Ave. at Natchez Trace Blvd.
2) Tootsie's Orchid Lounge. Tootsie's has been around since the old days when the Opry was held in the Ryman, is still something of a hang site for the more interesting side of the C&W set along with a collection of winos, bums, and other bizarre characters.
3) Rotier's and Brown's. Two original 1930s diners, intact for all practical purposes. Brown's is, in fact, still partly in a wooden trolley-car. And Rotier's burgers...served on toast, not buns...are a staple for a lot of music biz types. Rotier's is on Elliston Place just east of Centennial Park, Brown's is on Blair Blvd, just west of 21st Ave. A note: several years ago, a developer wanted to shut Rotier's down to demolish the old (also 1930s) building, a original 1930s gas station, it was in to build a new Eckerd Drug. Shades of Kahiki, right? WRONG! In this case, the mayor, several members of the TN legislature, the Davidson Co. sheriff, and a PILE of people skanked all upside Eckerd's head for even suggesting this. Result: Eckerd Drug's location there is built in the shell of the old 1930s gas station and Rotier's is still where it always was in the rear, in perpetuum.
James notes: I visited Rotiers in October, 2003, and wasn't all that impressed with the toastburgrs, but the Fried Pickles (yes Fried Pickles) were interesting. A few doors down there is a AMAZING antiquarian book store, and a great waterfall soda fountain (see picture).
4) Dairy King. I grew up on this place. The old neighborhood has declined, with a Mexican garage in the rear of the parking lot now, but the Dairy King...an original, still-extant late 1940s drive-in...still does a brisk business for lunch and in the summer evenings. Only open during summer, it still features 'bombers' that're made with actual beef, as opposed to the White Castle variety. On Thompson Ln. at the Mill Creek bridge.
5) Loveless Cafe and Motel. No, the motel isn't running anymore, but it's officially part of the name of the place. Even talking about this place sets me on edge, as the country-style food there falls under the heading of 'irreproduceable results'. THE place to eat, aside of Omni Hut, the above-mentioned joints, and some fine ethnic places, for a real slice of the area minus the touristy crapola. Serves breakfast, lunch and dinner...but dinner is what you want. Only two things on the menu: country ham or fried chicken. My suggestion: DO NOT eat lunch before dinner at Loveless! Marvel at the myriad pics on the walls from country stars and other major celebs who've eaten (and often still eat) there. Where else will you find pics of Leonard Bernstein hanging aside Ernest Tubb's? Also on Hwy. 100, in Pasquo (where part of my family settled in the 1780s!), just before the gateway to the Natchez Trace Pky.
6) Bill's. Now we're getting outside Nashville a little bit, but still close by. Bill's burned some years ago and was rebuilt, but the food is still the same. Channel catfish, hush puppies, and so on, southern-style. Another place Carl got to, in this case he did a phone interview with the SF Chronicle whilst stuffing three entire cats (minus bones, natch) down his neck! Up TN Hwy. 12, just SE of Ashland City.
&
7) One Stop Mkt. Inc. Used to be a 1940s grocery with a little window in the back where you could get pit BBQ. Then they added a counter. And then a few tables. And some more tables. And after some 30 years of this process, it eventually was no longer a grocery anymore, but The Place Where BBQ Aficionados Go When They Die. Another place where the infamous New Music composer and Eating Machine Carl Stone went, in this case having a full pound of pit-cooked hawg meat, two sides, half a loaf of cornbread...and then a BBQ sandwich for dessert! The BBQ is cooked carefully, according the the TN BBQ laws...yes, TN has special exemption laws for BBQ places that allow them to cook BBQ in the old, proper, slow, low-temp methods w/o violating health regs...for up to 16 hours, and actually disintegrates in your mouth, followed by (if you put it on) the flash of vinegary fire from the TN-style 'thin sauce' that permeates it. Located in Franklin (big C&W stars live here, along with people like Steve Winwood, et al) south of Nashville, on Columbia St. about 1 mi. S of 'Five Points'.
In a similar vein in Murfreesboro is Pope Taylor's BBQ, believed by some to possibly be the origin of the Butthole Surfers' song 'BBQ Pope'. Tumbledown place located on Old Hwy 70/Main St. about 3 miles east of town, when they moved the highway to the new fourlane Pope's got its own special sign installed by TNDOT directing people to it from the new main road.
8) The Arcade. Back in Nashville now, the Arcade is believed to be the first example of what eventually became the mall. However, this place dates from around the turn of the last century, and contained (last time I checked) some original 30s and 40s-style businesses, great neon, and the like. Downtown, between 4th and 5th Aves. south of Union.
9) The Great Escape. Used records and CDs. Remember: Nashville functions on the 'McDonalds principle' where music's concerned; you wouldn't want to eat at McDonalds if you worked there, and you don't want to listen to commercial country crap when you're not working on it. So at the used music places, plus a few other joints, you can find an amazing array of earsplinterage and earwarpage that's come out of various collection-culls of music biz people and such. Great Escape's main store is at the Broadway and Division St. fork. Big place, loads to go thru from CDs thru 78s.
The city also abounds with loads more Googie (the main period for that in Nashville was the 1960s, not the 50s and early 60s as in most other locales), 50s Modern, and remnants from the 1930s and 40s deco periods, plus a few still-extant Tiki bits, scattered all over. You have to know the city, though; Nashville beyond the music shuck is NOT tourist-friendly, and that's by design. There's been a concerted effort to keep the 'touron' hordes where THEY belong, and the city relatively untrammeled by them elsewhere, so no real 'tourist guides' exist for the rest of the city for the most part. It helps in understanding this, also, to realize that Nashville's primary business is not music, but big finance, healthcare, insurance, and the like. I would suggest that if you're going to make the trip down again sometime, consider going down for a few days to soak up the real vibe of the place, possibly dragging me along to serve as guide to all of this craziness. It is a very strange city, getting stranger every day.
Plus cops don't stop my Camry. Too nice. :)